Ever since that particular period of time (falling in love, getting interested in guys, having crushes, etc.), I knew that I can never be pretty. I never liked make-ups, nor going after jewelry and fancy dresses. Worse still, I take after my father, which makes me look like a boy. When all my girl friends were into make-ups, I concentrated on my inner beauty. I knew this verse from teenage years:-
Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. - 1 Peter 3:3-4 (TLB)
I hated the world and its definition of beauty. So no matter how others look at me or judge me, I couldn't be bothered at all. I knew that nothing is more important than to please my God. Over the years, I did have a crush or two but I successfully got over it. Well, I didn't quite like the feeling of it because when it happened, it took my sight away from God.
As I landed in Balhaf (Yemen), attention seemed to be on my colleague and I as there were no other women there. The two of us were being compared... one guy asked why my colleague, being a Caucasian, did not have the curves. Another guy who helped me with work even told me that I looked beautiful, compared to the lady who was there the last time.
Wow... I was flattered! I have never received any compliment of such before! When I was so totally down, upset, homesick, and feeling hopeless, a simple compliment "You are beautiful" touched my heart. From a compliment (which may sound lustful to some), it was transformed into a word of encouragement and affirmation. My heart sent the signal to my brain, "Look, you are beautiful in God's eyes! You complained that you have never heard Him saying it straight to you, now He did!"
I couldn't quite believe that guy when he said that, as I didn't know what his actual intention was. But whatever it was, if I, a nobody, can be beautiful in a stranger's eyes, then surely, it was God who made me beautiful and surely, I am beautiful in His eyes too. Besides being an affirmation for me, it also proved that God was there watching over me all the times, whether I was aware of it or not.
Yes, whether we are aware of it or not, whether we believe it or not, no matter how ugly we think we are, in God's eyes we are all His beautiful precious princes and princesses. If not, would He have sent His only Son to die for us?
When I was typing away to get this post completed, a friend of mine sent me a song with the title 'Beautiful'. I was really surprised... well, could it be such a coincident? So I decided to put the song here to share with everyone. Perhaps, you are in some kind of struggle to get attention from others, or you need a healing of your self-image. Whatever it is, please bear in mind -- when the whole world turn its back at you, God is always there for you; if someone says that you are ugly, don't forget that you are more precious than the Son in the eyes of the King.
"... You are precious in my sight and honoured, and I love you..." - Isaiah 43:4
God bless you!
Click the "Play" button to stream the song. For the lyrics, click here.
Homesick I - Out Of Fear
Homesick II - Home, Sweet, Home!